OK, so I’m sitting here

by Diana on May 18, 2009 · 3 comments

in At home, Little moments, Musings

For the second time in my life as a mom, my little girls have asked for me to let them put themselves to sleep like big girls.

So I read to them, got out of bed, turned off the light, turned on some lullabies, kissed them, told them I love them, tucked them in and slipped out of the room.

For the second night in a row, they feel asleep almost immediately.

Now I’m blogging, but just before that, I was just sitting here, staring into space.  I should be grateful that I have the night to myself, but I am in shock and not sure what to do with my time.  I should probably be going through files or packing boxes, but I feel disoriented.

We have always put our girls to sleep by reading them a story and then cuddling with them until they fall asleep.  Only then do we sneak out.  Lots of times, doing this makes me so tired that I end up just going to bed.

Sometimes, it made me crazed that I almost never had the evenings to myself.  My husband offered to put the girls to bed, but since I work out of the home full time, I really like bedtime so that I can spend time with the girls and read them stories.  I just wished that I had the energy after that to stay up and hang out with my husband and do other stuff, but so often I just don’t.

But then my friend Sandy told me to enjoy the bedtimes, that soon enough they would be a thing of the past.  So, I made peace with the fact that I just wouldn’t have the nights to myself for a while.

And now, here I am with a night to myself, and I just don’t know what to do with it.  I just want to snuggle with my girls, but at the same time I am so proud of them for wanting — and asking for — some independence.

I honestly can’t believe how fast they’re growing up.

{ 3 comments }

1 Genevieve May 18, 2009 at 8:32 pm

Aw! They’re growing up!! That’s great! That is a big step! We usually tag-team and one sings a few songs to Sean while the other sings to the girls. Just tonight Wayne said, “We should probably let Sean get to bed on his own.” – he’s done it for babysitters, but I guess I feel that as long as we’re doing it for the girls, why not? I know that I’ll be a little relieved, and yet a little sad at the same time when these night rituals is over. Hey! Maybe eventually you can use the time for knitting! ; )

2 Paul May 19, 2009 at 5:09 am

This is adorable. I’m happy and sad for you at the same time…

3 Molly May 25, 2009 at 11:43 am

I hear you about the bedtime closeness. My kids are 7, 5, and 2 and I do love to snuggle all three of them into my big bed at night… when they fall asleep, we transfer the older two into their own beds, which they don’t seem to mind. One thing that’s tough to figure is who gets to stay next to me during the falling-asleep part. 7 and 5 both want to stay on one side of me, and neither wants to let 2 sneak in between, and 2 doesn’t want to be left on either far side. No choice but to make 7 and 5 concede to 2 on alternate nights!!

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