For the second time in my life as a mom, my little girls have asked for me to let them put themselves to sleep like big girls.
So I read to them, got out of bed, turned off the light, turned on some lullabies, kissed them, told them I love them, tucked them in and slipped out of the room.
For the second night in a row, they feel asleep almost immediately.
Now I’m blogging, but just before that, I was just sitting here, staring into space. I should be grateful that I have the night to myself, but I am in shock and not sure what to do with my time. I should probably be going through files or packing boxes, but I feel disoriented.
We have always put our girls to sleep by reading them a story and then cuddling with them until they fall asleep. Only then do we sneak out. Lots of times, doing this makes me so tired that I end up just going to bed.
Sometimes, it made me crazed that I almost never had the evenings to myself. My husband offered to put the girls to bed, but since I work out of the home full time, I really like bedtime so that I can spend time with the girls and read them stories. I just wished that I had the energy after that to stay up and hang out with my husband and do other stuff, but so often I just don’t.
But then my friend Sandy told me to enjoy the bedtimes, that soon enough they would be a thing of the past. So, I made peace with the fact that I just wouldn’t have the nights to myself for a while.
And now, here I am with a night to myself, and I just don’t know what to do with it. I just want to snuggle with my girls, but at the same time I am so proud of them for wanting — and asking for — some independence.
I honestly can’t believe how fast they’re growing up.